I was reading this book “Clear Thinking” by Shane Parrish. And in one of the chapter he said “Being wise is not just about keeping your biological defaults in check or knowing how to get what you want; it is about knowing which things are actually worth wanting in the first place”.
Then he suggested this exercise:
The author provides a very specific and powerful exercise to help you figure out what is actually worth wanting. He bases this on the ancient Stoic concept of Memento Mori (remembering death), arguing that shifting your perspective to the end of your life strips away all the superficial things and reveals what truly matters.
Here are the specific instructions and thought experiments the author provides for this exercise:
1. The 80-Year-Old Thought Experiment
To figure out what you really want, the author instructs you to clear your mind and imagine that you are eighty years old and nearing the end of your life. Picture yourself sitting on a park bench on a beautiful fall day, observing the world around you. Taking as much time as you need, ask yourself the following specific questions from the perspective of your 80-year-old self:
- Who are the people in your life, and in what ways have you influenced them?
- What have you done for them, and how have you made them feel?
- What are the things you’ve accomplished, and what possessions do you have?
- What matters most as you approach your final days, and what seems unimportant?
- What memories do you cherish, and what are the things you regret?
- What do your friends and family say about you?
2. The Steve Jobs Daily Ritual
To apply this insight to your everyday choices, the author recommends a daily ritual famously used by Steve Jobs. Every morning, look in the mirror and ask yourself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?”. The instruction here is simple: if your answer is “no” for too many days in a row, you know it is time to make a change.
3. The Regret Minimization Framework
Borrowing from Jeff Bezos, the author suggests projecting yourself forward to age 80 and asking how you can “minimize the number of regrets” you have when looking back. The author emphasizes that we tend to regret the things we didn’t do (the dreams we didn’t chase, the love we didn’t leap at) far more than the things we tried and failed at.
4. The Final Year Question
Finally, you can test your current trajectory by asking yourself: “If this were your final year of life, would you be living the same way you are today?”.
The Goal of the Exercise
The author notes that when you imagine your life in hindsight, the superficial goals forced onto you by your biological defaults—like chasing money, status, or winning petty arguments—suddenly look incredibly small. All external expectations, pride, and fear fall away. By practicing this exercise, you turn your “future hindsight into your current foresight,” allowing you to see the gap between who you are and who you want to be so you can adjust your course today.
